FRIENDS DO

The following dialog comes from the Rocky series;

Rocky Balboa: “Nobody owes nobody nothin’. You owe yourself.”

Paulie: “You’re wrong! Friends owe!”

Rocky Balboa: “Friends don’t owe! They do because they wanna do.”

In all of his bone crushing wisdom, Rocky really hits this one out of the park.

So many people think because they have friends, the friends are obligated to be their best customers! I hate to break your bubbles but more times than not, your friends will NOT buy anything at all! They would love to, they want to help you succeed, they want you do well, but they usually don’t have the last word in the decision making process.

Don’t hold it against them, as a matter of fact in many cases save yourself and them the embarrassment by not even asking them to buy. Instead, ask them for their help finding other prospects. Many times these friends can give you names and point you in the right direction to find good customers.

Remember what Rocky said, “Friends don’t owe, friends do because they wanna do”. Your friends “wanna do”, you need to make it as easy as you can for them “TO DO!”

THEY DON’T OWE YOU, friendship isn’t built on a payback basis. You don’t do things for friends because you expect to get paid back. You do things for friends because you want to. No one is keeping score, no one is going to hold court and decide if everything is FAIR.

If we all have the same expectations of one another than no one will feel they didn’t get what’s coming to them. If by some chance a friend has expectations that are greater than you think they should be, you need address it and make sure that you both reach an agreement.

I have seen some long time friendships come to an end because of the expectations that because they are my friend I can depend on them to buy from me. In class after class a new rep would tell me about their best friend who they are going to call on first thing and make a huge sale. A week later I would get the phone call and hear a deflated rep telling me about how their friend let them down.

Friends are hard to come by. REAL friends are rare. We all have many people that we call friends, but if push came to shove, how many of these so called friends would be there for you in times of trouble? Experience tells me NOT MANY! Does that mean you should cross these people off your Christmas Card list? Heck no, it means that you need to re-evaluate your relationship and get a better hold on who you can and can’t count on. I have a lot of people that I love and enjoy being with, but I know that NONE of them will be the ones to come to me aid if I were in trouble. If you were to sit down and make the same sort of list I am certain you would come to the same conclusions.

I don’t want this to sound like a negative post. It isn’t, it is a post that needs to be read and a post that needs to be understood by new reps and experienced reps alike. The old saying don’t mix business with pleasure is true. As reps mature in the profession they start to develop two sets of friends, their personal friends and their business friends. Occasionally a crossover happens and a business friend becomes a personal friend and vice versa.

I have a few personal friends that started as business friends. I have never crossed the line in either direction. I don’t ask nor do I expect anything special from them. I simply enjoy their friendship and they do the same.

This is a balancing act that you will need to develop the skills for. When you do, you will find that:

Friends are priceless. Don’t put a price on them.

Friends are hard to find, but easy to lose

Friends are friends because they want to be friends

FRIENDS DON’T OWE! THEY DO BECAUSE THEY WANNA DO.

Lorin