MONKEY IN THE MIDDLE

I was having a discussion with a sales rep today that was having trouble with one of her accounts. As we talked she kept telling me about how ever since the new manager came in she has been the referee between the new manager and her old contact.

I asked her what has been happening and she told me about times when the new manager was telling her about stuff her contact was doing and then she would tell me about her contact telling her about what the new guy was doing. She felt as if each one was trying to get her “on their side”.

She went so far as to tell me that her sales manager would let her she would walk away from the account all together because she didn’t need the aggravation.

All I could do was to listen and nod my head every now and again to let her know I was still awake. After about what seems like hours, but was more like 30 minutes, I asked her what she was going to do about it. She looked at me as if I were nuts! She was obviously waiting for me to offer up a suggestion as to how to handle this like I usually do.

I had some ideas, but I felt this was a time that in order for any idea to work, it had to be HER IDEA. I guess she got over the shock of me not telling her a solution quickly because she started asking me if this idea was good or should she do something else. She asked and asked and I stood my ground. (I did chuckle to myself a few times)

Then she asked me if I thought it were possible that the two guys were working together to see if she could be trusted and to see if she would talk badly about one to the other. I hadn’t thought of that. So I got back into the conversation asking her about what kind of things they were saying about one another. It didn’t take long for me to realize that her suggestion was a very viable one.

We talked for a few more minutes about this and then she told me what she was going to do, she said she was going to keep listening to both of them and NOT talking sides or offering anything one said to the other. I thought that was a great idea but I had to ask if she thought she could do it for an extended time. She was confident she could.

At this point I told her how proud I was of her because she solved her own problem and only needed a sounding board. I told her that her solution was good as long as she could keep it up, but warned her of the pitfalls of taking sides in any way.

This wasn’t the first time I had heard about a sales rep being caught in a game of Monkey In The Middle between two people in a customer’s business. It is the first time I have heard of the game going on as long as this one seems to have been going on with no sign of ending.

My best advice to you as it finally was to her is to be careful of games that you play with customers, especially when you don’t know all the rules and what it takes to win the game.

Just like playing monkey in the middle as a kid, the game usually doesn’t end without someone getting hurt. If you are caught in the middle do what you can to remove yourself from the game. You may need to be rather blunt with the customers and let them know (one at a time of course) that you are uncomfortable and you understand their frustration but you are not in the position to do more than just listen. If they are looking for you to take sides, this will sometimes let them know in a non-confrontational way, that you are not willing to do so.

Remember, we aren’t talking about your baseball cap now, we are talking about your living. You can’t afford to play games when it comes to your livelihood.

Lorin